When the Double Diamond comes to Dinner
- Mar 16
- 3 min read
A curious observation on why "Discover" can be the hardest (and most rewarding) phase to get right:
I’ve spent the last few months at General Assembly getting acquainted with one of the foundational frameworks of UX: The Double Diamond.
On paper, it’s a beautiful, symmetrical map of the design process. You start by opening up your thinking (Discover), narrowing it down to the “why” (Define), exploring a world of possibilities (Develop), and finally landing on a solution that works (Deliver).
It’s logical. It’s structured. And as it turns out, it’s remarkably effective for navigating a conversation with an seven year-old over a bowl of pasta!
The “Leading the Witness” Trap
Tonight, while chatting with my daughter about her day, I found myself doing what we often do in business and in life: I caught myself jumping straight to “Deliver.”
She was frustrated about something that happened in her reading group and my “Ops Brain” immediately started building a solution. I had started asking a leading question, accidentally imposing my own assumptions onto her situation, and trying to fix a problem I hadn’t actually defined yet.
Then, I caught myself. I decided to try a little experiment, reset, and go back to the first diamond.
Opening the Diamond (again, just properly this time)
I shifted my approach. I stopped suggesting “why” she was upset and started asking open, non-leading questions to cast a wider net. I sat in the Discover phase and listened to build actual empathy rather than assumed empathy.
The User Insight
The result? A classic UX “aha!” moment. By widening the conversation, I discovered two things:
The issue I assumed was a “major frustration” was actually something she hadn’t spent much time thinking about at all.
The root cause of her annoyance was attributed to something completely different from my initial guess!
If I had stayed in my “Deliver” mindset, I would have solved a problem that didn’t exist and completely missed the one that did. In that moment, I was truly able to just listen and understand and the conversation built beautifully after that which totally filled my cup.
Imagine if I hadn’t have caught that slip? Or not started the course and ever have realised these little tendencies especially in child - adult interactions. I love the way that this new “UX” lens is impacting every corner of my life. I don’t know if it is the immersive nature of the course, or just the natural conclusion of exploring a new subject that keeps it front and central but I am seeing the effect everywhere. (Remind me to come back and tell you about the dishwasher from week 2 of the course another day!!)
The Connectivity of Design
In the real world, we use usability testing, heuristics, and competitive research to fill that first diamond. We use affinity mapping and personas to Define our focus. We use Crazy 8s and prototyping to Develop ideas before we ever hit Deliver.
But at its core, the Double Diamond is just a reminder to stay curious really. It’s a safeguard against the human tendency to assume we already know the answer.
Whether I’m re-architecting a business system for a client or trying to understand a reading group drama, the “magic” is always in the opening up before the narrowing down.
Over to you... I’m curious -especially for those of you who are deep in the design world -where has the Double Diamond accidentally improved your “real-life” relationships? Have you ever caught yourself “leading the witness” at home or with friends?
I’d love to hear your “UX in the wild” observations in the comments.